Kathryn’s Birth story
What a day February 9th was… the anticipation for this day was unparalleled to anything I had experienced before. Labor is such a complex thing to wait for and in the waiting does it shape you for the acceptance of what is to unfold.
The day before, being 5 days overdue, I told myself to go about life normally to try to ignore the fact that I wasn't in labor and this baby hadn’t arrived when I “thought.” I had had prodromal labor for weeks so I really thought that baby Foltz would make an early arrival. But here I was, overdue and over it. I went to a friend’s bridal shower in the morning and then that evening went to another friend’s birthday party. I was abnormally exhausted at this party and decided to head home early to take a bath and head to bed early (so glad I did!) I clearly remember in the bath that night before listening to my birth playlist and praying over this baby, feeling so much peace that I would meet baby Foltz soon.
The songs described my hope looking ahead to what was to come, both in the upcoming birth, and also the hope for our family that was growing. Something I have been praying over us and our baby is to see God as a God of faithfulness.
Going to bed that night, I didn’t know what was to wake me but I felt peace.
At 2:30am on February 9th, I woke up to very rhythmic contractions that I had to breathe through. I felt as if my body had skipped early labor because these felt very close together. Not painful or intense enough for vocalizing but a pattern was forming and forming fast. I now understood what it meant to describe contractions as a wave, it’s so hard to describe the feeling but I do feel like that is the best description.
Because of all of the “false alarms” I'd had, I didn’t want to wake up Eli just yet. I tried to go back to bed but I wasn’t able to and just rode the waves for another hour or so before I woke Eli up. At this point they didn’t feel intense enough to call the birth team but I wanted Eli to be aware that I thought maybe just maybe I might be in labor. Eli rubbed my back through the next few contractions as they began to intensify more, I knew that it wasn't going to stop and this was the real thing. Funny story at this point. Our car parking situation at our house is a bit complicated so I knew we would need to move one of our cars down the street to a parking lot in order to have space for the birth team. So I said to Eli at 4:30am that we needed to move the cars and he thought I was crazy, but I knew it was now or never haha. Little did I know I was in transition at this point when I drove my car up the road. When we got back, I called Jamie our midwife and Sara to let them know that I’d been having consistent contractions for 2-3 hours. I remember on the phone with Jamie, I had a contraction and it was the first contraction that I intuitively did horse lips breathing in. I thought that was super cool that my body just knew to vocalize in that way to cope… it continued to escalate from there.
Jamie came around 6:30am and did a cervical check. I thought I would maybe be 4cm moving into active labor… but I was 8-9cm! I was so excited and surprised as I didn’t really feel the intensity of transition and really felt like the contractions were super manageable for what I expected 8-9cm to feel like. Jamie told Eli to get the tub ready as she thought Kimball would be here soon. The rest of the team was notified to come as we all thought it would be quick. Jamie had to leave as she had another client who was also 8-9cm and ready to push at the same time, but luckily our birth photographer extraordinaire is also a licensed midwife, so Dani stepped in so graciously to allow for Jamie to be with the other mom. I really thought that Dani would be the one delivering Kimball with how things were going, but oh how things took a turn.
For the next little bit, I was doing upright positions while I waited for the tub to fill up. I was on the toilet, doing supported standing over the bed, lunges, etc to try to get the last bit of cervix to finish. Several hours go by and still no baby or urge to push. I felt like the contraction hadn’t really grown more intense and they were actually spacing out. I was still able to talk in between contractions and with the whole team there, Dani, Sara and my friend Oliva, I was socializing a bit too much for being at 9cm. Jamie was able to go to the other birth and come back to us after that baby had been born, which none of us thought would be the case, but I am so grateful she was able to be there! She got back with her assistant, Marleah around 10am and I asked for her to check my cervix to see what was going on. I was 9cm with a puffy cervical lip. I was at this point frustrated that I hadn’t made much progress. She encouraged me to lay on my side to help the swollen cervix and to have just some time with Eli and I with Sara doing craniosacral and praying over me to help me get into “labor brain” and a better pattern. Jamie also gave me black and blue cohosh to increase the power of the contractions. I clearly remember a shift happening when it was just the three of us in the room, seeing Eli and Sara support me as the intensity grew, feeling so held by them both.
We labored together for another hour and Jamie checked again around 11:30 am, still the lip, and Kimball had dropped to +1 station, so she tried to hold it back behind the head but it was too painful for me to handle her doing that for too long so she encouraged me to continue to lay on my side. At this point with Kimball being lower, I started to feel more pressure in my vagina but also such a strong pinch right at my pubic bone due to Kimball trying to get past the pubic bone with a swollen cervix. At this point I had a good cry with Eli, Sara and Jamie as I felt like I was hitting a mental wall of fear that through voicing it out, I felt the wall coming down as I entered into labor brain.
I then got back in the tub but the contractions began to space out again, which was nice for the moment but I knew I needed powerful contractions to meet the baby. The tub sadly just wasn’t helpful for the process as it relaxed me too much and stopped contractions. I moved around a bit but felt like I was most productive on my side. Around 12:30, Jamie asked if she could try to hold the lip back again as I had now felt a bit of an urge to push. She was able to hold it back with directed pushes but felt that Kimball’s head was a bit asynclitic to the left side. Another couple hours went by and I was so frustrated that this was taking so long and was SO pinchy at my pubic bone, I begged to get back in the tub as I knew it would slow things down and relieve it. The tub really didn’t do what I had hoped and I started to feel faint and like I was going to pass out with the heat of the tub, so I got back out. At this point I really didn’t think I could do it and was starting to vocalize that to the birth team. At 2:30pm, Jamie offered to break my water to see if that could help Kimball get past the pubic bone and relieve the pinch feeling that kept me from feeling like I could make productive pushes. There was still a slight lip when she broke my water so she encouraged me to stop pushing and pant through the urges. That was SO hard to fight the urge to push but I knew that it would help in the long run. My team was so vital at this point to really help coach me in pushing and give direction on when I could use the urge and when to just breathe. Another hour goes by and by 3:30pm, I was so done. I was asking for the epidural and starting to spiral in negative talk. The words of each person in the room were so vital to encourage me to be present and to shift my thoughts from self-doubt. I remember being encouraged to speak truth instead the negative words I was saying, so I just began to say the name of Jesus and saying, “Jesus you’re with me.” This shift was powerful.
When I was asking for the epidural, Jamie, being so clear and gracious, had me talk through what that process would look like so I knew the reality was that the pain wouldn’t be taken away for at least another hour or more, and I'd likely have a baby by then. She asked if I could give it another 20 minutes of just breathing and see what I want to do after. In those next 20 minutes, I started to feel my tissue stretching and felt so encouraged that the baby was lower and had made it past my pubic bone. The intensity of pushing and letting my tissue stretch was so much more than I expected but it also felt productive. I remember Eli being at my head and Sara tapping his shoulder to go get ready to catch Kimball. This was a special moment for both of us, knowing our baby would get to be born at home! The burn grew and grew but as I felt his head begin to grow in my hand, I knew he’d be here soon. With the encouragement and clear direction of everyone around me, Kimball was born at 5:16pm on February 9th! Eli got to catch him and announce… It's a boy!! That moment together, holding Kimball and being held by Eli was so special, the unknown and unseen of pregnancy and birth was now in our arms. What a gift!
