At Home Birth
Rylie’s Birth Story
Friday, January 19th, 10:50 PM. I got up out of bed and my water broke. I was so excited and shocked that I smacked James’s feet to wake him up and tell him. I called my midwives and doulas to let them know. They encouraged me to go back to sleep if I could and get as much rest as possible. I had my first contraction about 30 minutes later. I had contractions throughout the night and by morning they were about 15 minutes apart. I started doing the miles circuit and Kathryn and Heather (my doulas) came over to show me some different moves to help get Goldie to engage in my pelvis. Around 2:00 Laney and Kate (my midwives) came over to check on us. As they were feeling for Goldie’s position, they found that she was asynclitic - her head was tilted and caught on the top of my pelvis, which stopped her from dropping down and engaging. We went over more positions to do that would give her enough room to back up and reposition herself and Laney did some gentle massage on my belly. James and I spent all day going through the positions. Around 7:00 PM I was feeling very discouraged. My contractions would go from 15 minutes to 2 hours apart and I was pretty sure her head was still tilted. Because my water had broken, I only had 48 hours to be in active labor before we would have to revisit my birth plan. I went into Goldie’s nursery and turned on worship music and let myself cry. I let out all the fear and uncertainty. I prayed. I talked to Goldie. I gave myself a moment to feel all of my feelings so that I would be able to move past them. After talking with Laney and Kate we decided I would drink a castor oil drink in the morning as a way to naturally induce labor. Thankfully, I was able to get some good sleep that night.
I got out of bed around 6:30 AM to move around and do more movements - I also really wanted orange juice. My contractions were still not very regular at this point but I felt so much peace in that early morning, I knew God was with me in the midst of it all. I laid back down and slept for a few hours.
Kathryn and Heather came back over that morning to show me some different movements again that would help with realigning Goldie’s head. Around 11:00 I drank the castor oil concoction. Yum. That stayed down for about 30 minutes and I puked it up. At 12:30, I drank more. And again, I puked it up. I let Laney know and she told me if I wasn’t in a good rhythm by 5:00, we’d need to revisit the plan for my birth but to take the next hour to try and relax and give myself a break and that she would be over around 2:00 to check on us. I cried some more. I was so confused why nothing was progressing and I was frustrated. James rubbed my back and told me that it would all be okay, to talk to her, and to pray. Around 1:00 my contractions started to get closer. By 2:00 they were 6 minutes apart, but I wasn’t fully convinced I was in active labor yet. To be honest, I was afraid to get my hopes up. James and I moved into Goldie’s room and he put on my playlist for her birth. Laney and Kate arrived around 2:30 and checked my vitals and Goldie’s heart rate and told me they would be staying, it was actually happening. I could relax into the process. At this point I could still interact between contractions. They were painful, but I had made my mind up that I wasn’t going to fight against them. I trusted my body. I spent most of my pregnancy preparing my mind for this moment. I knew God created my body to carry and birth my baby. I knew that all I had to do was keep breathing. I made the decision to surrender to whatever birth looked like.
My contractions continued to speed up and get more intense. Heather and James helped me into the pool and it felt amazing. The water was soothing and comforting. Around this time I started to go into myself. I wasn’t talking in between contractions anymore. I was aware of my team in the room but it was like everything was background noise. James was there holding my hands. Telling me how amazing I was doing. Moving from position to position with me, supporting me in every way he could. At some point, Laney asked if I could feel her head. I checked and she was only a finger length away. I was so happy, I knew we would meet her so soon. This was around 6:00, although at the time I had no idea what time it was. My team had me moving around, trying different positions to help open my pelvis and help Goldie move down. There were times I didn’t want to move, I knew the contractions would feel more intense and I didn’t want to have to go through getting comfortable again, but I knew it was necessary. I trusted the people around me to help me through it. This space of time feels very fluid in my mind. I knew it was taking longer than I expected since I had felt her head but I had no idea how long I had been in labor. I tried to focus on riding the waves and not fighting my body but there were times I fought against the pain. I started to breathe shallow breathes and gasp for air then pull away from the contractions; but my team was there to remind me to relax, to breathe deeply, to lean into each contraction. They held my hands, they prayed over us, they reminded me that I could do this.
I have no idea when I started pushing. No one told me to do it, I just felt the urge. My body knew exactly what it was doing. I was in and out of the water, on the toilet, on the ground. Kate reminded me of some of my birth affirmations, Heather prayed over us, James held me, Kathryn did counter pressure, Lindsey helped me relax my shoulders and face, they all sat with me in every moment. I knew I wasn’t alone in this. I was supported. Eventually Laney had everyone leave the room except for her, Kate, and James. I was so exhausted by this point but she was so close. Her head was only the top knuckle of my finger away. I was leaning over the peanut ball, almost falling asleep between contractions and this was the point in time where I really questioned myself. I started to question if I made the right choice, if I was really strong enough to do this. Every push took every ounce of energy I had. Then I heard Laney softly say, “Rylie, you can do this. Push her into your hand.” They grabbed a mirror so that I could see her head. I knew it was the home stretch. I thought that it would be fast, but it wasn’t, it was excruciatingly slow. I kept asking why it was taking so long, I asked Kate what I was doing wrong, but they continued to encourage me that it was all normal, that my body needed time to stretch and adjust. Laney reminded me to lean into my contractions, not run away from them. Kate and James helped get me into a half lunge position and I kept pushing.
Finally I watched as her head came into my hand, the relief was like nothing I’ve ever known and then a rush of excitement that I was about to have my baby girl in my arms. Laney told me that when I caught her, to wait to pull her up because her cord was wrapped around her neck but that she was okay and she was breathing. With my next contraction and one last push, she was born right into my hands. And surprise to all of us, her cord wasn’t wrapped, it was her arm wrapped around her neck. That was why it had taken so long. But it all washed away in that moment that I pulled her up to my chest. I saw her sweet, squished face and felt the most overwhelming wave of love and joy burst in my chest. I finally had her in my arms. At 1:08 AM on January 22nd we met our baby girl. James did skin to skin with her while Amy helped me to the bathroom and into our bed. After about an hour, James got to cut her cord and she was weighed and measured. Kathryn made us food out of my bare kitchen (whoops.) And we snuggled into bed with our new little baby girl.